The phrase “love thy neighbor” used to be common in Christian circles, as a reminder of Jesus’ famous admonition to all of us. However, as time goes by, this phrase is either passing out of use or becoming mysterious to people who have not read the Bible thoroughly. What does it mean to love our neighbors?
A “neighbor” is one who lives “nigh” (nearby). When a lawyer in ancient times asked Jesus, “Who is my neighbor?” Jesus told him the story of the Good Samaritan. This story of a Gentile man who helped a Jewish stranger who had been robbed and was lying near death illustrates that one’s neighbor can be a member of another nation or ethnicity, or a total stranger. The Good Samaritan loved his neighbor by helping a total stranger who was obviously in need of assistance, even though the Samaritan had never met the Jewish man before. The Good Samaritan acted kindly as a friend to the stranger, even though helping the stranger did not directly benefit him at all. In fact, the Good Samaritan paid for the injured stranger’s lodging and care out of his own pocket, without worrying about the expense.
“Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy strength, and with all thy mind; and thy neighbor as thyself.” (Luke 10:27 -- Jesus’ words)
The Old Testament, particularly the law of God, is full of admonitions about how to treat neighbors. One of the Ten Commandments says not to bear false witness (tell lies) against our neighbors (Exodus 20:16). The very next verse (Exodus 20:17) reminds us not to covet (look with envy upon) our neighbors’ houses or wives, or anything that belongs to our neighbors. Leviticus 19:13 says that we should not defraud our neighbors, or rob them. Leviticus 19:16-18 forbid talebearing (gossip), hurtful actions, or hate specifically directed toward our neighbors. These verses end with the phrase that Jesus quoted out of God’s law, “Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself.”
But how do we love our neighbors as ourselves? According to the Bible, we all basically love ourselves, no matter what apparent problems we might have with “self-esteem.” “For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church.” (Ephesians 5:29) Even a person who is suicidal loves himself, because he is only thinking of his own pain and how to end it. A suicidal person rarely thinks of the pain he might cause those who love him. A suicidal person may even deny that anyone loves him, although God loves all of humanity, and His will is that everyone should have His best.
In contrast to a suicidal or selfish person, a person who loves his neighbor as himself will nourish and cherish his neighbor by constantly wishing him the best, and performing kind actions that will promote his neighbor’s physical and spiritual health. A person who sincerely loves his neighbor will warn him of danger, comfort him in despair, and help him through trials. Someone who loves his neighbor will pray for his neighbor, rather than ignore, criticize, or gossip about his neighbor.
Life is full of conflict, and our neighbors can cause lots of it. If we have disturbing or bothersome neighbors, or if we brush up against abrasive people as we go through our days, do we respond defensively or aggressively to them, as they do to us? Do we show them God’s love by being good neighbors to them, whether or not they are good neighbors to us? Do we go out of our way to show kindness to them, or bring the good news of the gospel to them? If we as nominal Christians respond with hate or spite when others are hateful to us, we are no better than they are, and we are not allowing the Holy Spirit within us to shine out of our lives. In fact, the Bible says that if we call ourselves Christians and yet fail to love our neighbors, it is doubtful that God’s Holy Spirit resides in us at all. We may be sadly deluded about our status with God, if we fail to love our neighbors in the same way that God has loved us. After all, God loves all of humanity, including our exasperating neighbors.
“Whosoever hateth his brother is a murderer: and ye know that no murderer hath eternal life abiding in him.” (I John 3:15)
“But whoso hath this world’s good, and seeth his brother have need, and shutteth up his bowels of compassion from him, how dwelleth the love of God in him? (I John 3:17)
Because of these verses, I have explained to little children that to hate someone is to wish that person out of existence, or to want to kill that person. I have encountered pushback to this idea. I have even had a child go home to his parents and ask them if “hate” means the same thing as “kill,” and I have had the child inform me that his parents told him that I was wrong. However, I am not the one who makes the rules. The Bible teaches that hate is the opposite of love. Hate desires harm to people, and curses others, but love wishes blessing upon them.
Every admonition to treat our neighbors with gentleness and fairness is an encouragement to love them instead of hate them. Although our good works toward our neighbors cannot buy us salvation (only the blood of Jesus can do that), good works toward our neighbors should be the logical evidence of God’s Holy Spirit living in our hearts, once we are saved by His mercy. We look to the law of God to see what God’s love in action toward our neighbors should look like, not in an attempt to compete with them, or in an attempt to gain “brownie points” with God.
“Owe no man any thing, but to love one another: for he that loveth another hath fulfilled the law. For this, Thou shalt not commit adultery, Thou shalt not kill, Thou shalt not steal, Thou shalt not bear false witness, Thou shalt not covet; and if there be any other commandment, it is briefly comprehended in this saying, namely, Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself. Love worketh no ill to his neighbor: therefore love is the fulfilling of the law.” (Romans 13:8-10)
“For, brethren, ye have been called unto liberty; only use not liberty for an occasion to the flesh, but by love serve one another. For all the law is fulfilled in one word, even in this; Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself. But if ye bite and devour one another, take heed that ye be not consumed one of another.” (Galatians 5:13-15)
“Out of the same mouth proceedeth blessing and cursing. My brethren, these things ought not so to be.” (James 3:10)
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